AGING YOUNGER , A PARADIGM SHIFT

The most overrated subject in this world is aging.Millions of "thinking man and women hours"have been wasted on this vanity induced and narcissist perception of looking younger.Scientists and doctors the world over are happily "discovering some gene or dna in rocks,trees and even algae or some genome from vegetation to come up with a cure to stop aging.And now with the God Particle having being discovered,God help us!!.The cure is only a test tube or pill away from our reach.There are anti-aging creams,fairness creams,something called botox which indeed permits you to delude that you look younger than you really are.

It is no longer a perrogative of our tinsel town folks to go under the scalpel;most of our well-heeled cousins and friends do not have a second thought about getting a nose job,tummy tuck,thigh tuck or boob job done-cost no bar!!.On a more serious note,we have amongst us now "cosmetic surgery addicts"who suffer from Body Dysmorphic Disorder.A person with BDD suffers from extremely low self-esteem,envy over other's appearance,strong feelings of shame,and repeatedly consulting with plastic surgeons or dermatologists to find ways to improve his or her appearance.

Such are the social pressures to look younger,smarter and acceptable that people are actually saving up for these "procedures".Wonder what happened to saving for a rainy day? Probably with the rains playing traunt this "saving" is more relavent now than ever before.

THE ACTUAL SOLUTION TO AGING EMANATES FROM THE SAME AREA AS THE DESIRE TO STALL IT.OUR BRAIN.We can train our brain( hey that rhymes) to visualize  and think about anything we desire.But first let us stop counting and worrying about the candles on the cake with each passing year.Age really is a state of the mind.Meditation and yoga practices can greatly help in this correction of our thought process.Visualization is simply powerfully focused thoughts in pictures.When you visualize then you materialize.Belief creates the actual fact.

Desire is not a bad word.Desire truth,desire honesty,love,friends,happiness,money(sure why not)? You will find contentment the moment you LOSE the desire to age younger. A few wrinkles on the face or neck or hands are simply physical manifestations of age.

Back to THINKING.The first part is to erase what has been placed genetically in our thoughts.Now substitute this space with ENERGY.a YOUNG MIND DISPLAYS A LOT OF ENERGY.By thinking energetically you VITALISE your space.You achieve a lot more.You develop a "can do" attitude.Suddenly people want a piece of YOUR action,YOUR time,YOUR company.And you are not even trying.That is the paradigm shift we should aspire for in our effort to age younger.

If you follow these suggestions please thank me for saving you your hard earned money.Better still,do some charity with it."Giving" releases a chemical in our brain called dopamine,which actually makes you "feel good" and YOUNGER.

CARING FOR THE ELDERLY AND AGING

Consider yourself truly blessed and fortunate if The Almighty has chosen you to care for an elder and aged person. As a matter of fact if you happen to look closer, surely there is an elder or aged person who needs caring in your own building or colony.

In order to make life easier for both you and the aged, banish the thought of trying to CHANGE them-habits or activity-wise. You be ready to ADAPT yourself. Remind yourself you have a child to deal with....running nose,wet diapers,food falling out of the mouth,et all. You may also need eyes at the back of your head.

With aging comes various physical challenges.Some of these require assistance to overcome. At times we feel annoyed at the repetitive nature of our elderly. So WHAT?. Why do we assume we are never going to face the same dilemma later on in our own lives?. Being empathetic can seriously help us develop the right attitude towards our elders.Draw on your prayers and ask for this quality.It is easily the single most important attribute besides love.

We need to make a correction of ATTITUDE towards the aged,old or differently abled who cross our paths in our lifetime. Think of care giving as a blessing. Think of care giving as your duty. Think of care giving as your perogative. Usually we get drawn into care giving only for a few years of our life.Rarely does it occur for an entire lifetime. Realising this fact can mellow down the worst of critics of care giving for the elders.

My mother was the only daughter amongst 5 siblings. She was the favourite of my grandmother, who spent her last ten years of her life with us. My mother passed away three years before her mother due to a losing battle with cancer of the colon. Our immediate concern was for "mam-ma's" reaction, as we called granny affectionately. She would not be able to take the loss of her favourite child we feared. Just then Dadar Mazda played his card.Mamma developed partial or selective amnesia. She started calling my wife by my mother's name. She had no past or current memory of her daughter AT ALL. We all were left completely gobsmacked. HIS miraculous powers strenghtened our resolve to continue caring for mamma with renewed energy. She was like a little happy-go-lucky child. She loved her     "pe pe"as she called sweets after every meal. She ate icecream gleefully till it dripped down her cheeks,hands and onto her gown.(she had lost partial ability of hand eye coordination),but SO WHAT? I shared another karmic connection with mamma which was uncanny. The moment i'd step into the washroom she would knock on the door without fail. She would repeat an activity that had just been completed. Like having a cup of tea,or changing her gown,or even inviting the postman into the house for a cup of tea. Once she opened the cupboard and paid Rs.10,000.00 to the butcher when he deliverd half a kilo of mutton my wife had ordered; ofcourse he was familiar with mamma's antics, rang the doorbell to return the money to my wife promptly.

Mamma passed away peacefully in my wifes arms one evening in July.

Who can an elder depend on during the last few years on earth? It is a shame if the answer is anything but yourself. Leaving your elders in the gerariatrics ward of some hospital,or an old age home is the worst form of cruelty you can hand them. Yet many of us are guilty of doing exactly that. TIME is the excuse or rather the lack of it.At times the elderly develop amnesia,incontinence,or repetitive behaviour or some other behavioural inconsistency. Aah! we have our excuse to be rude to them and start showing intolerance. Some of us are guilty of even giving them corporal punishment. Go hang yourselves!

To sum up-pray for patience,draw on love as deep as you can,develop generosity and loads of EMPATHY.there are no gaurantees in life-the person you are caring for today MAY BE DEAD TOMORROW.WHO KNOWS ,YOU MAY BE DEAD TOMORROW.Either ways your worries are over...and you missed out the GREATEST OPPORTUNITY Dadar Ahuramazda wanted you to enjoy.

A DEEP BREATH OF SUNSHINE!

The reason for writing A PUFF IN THE DARK was to create a general awareness in our com and readers of the lurking menace of substance abuse.Any names mentioned were purely fictional,so first my apologies to all the Hoshangs,Homis,Dalis,Beniffers,Armaitys,Firozs and Firozas who may have read APITD.

To state the obvious, Life has its share of pit falls. Compared to other coms,we can consider ourselves just a wee bit more comfortable,socio economic wise.And that is precisely another cause for concern.What with the information explosion(read overload) this generation is experiencing ,the perils of substance abuse have grown manifold.As a matter of fact there are more substances to abuse than ever before.Thecontention of writing on the subject was never to be morbid or scare the living daylights out of you……….But on second thoughts-this subject is such that it might actually help!

Presenting a dilemma should always be offered with some solutions.Due to space constraints  it was not possible to do so in the same issue.Now,Freyan and space permitting,I takethat liberty.Once a user has taken the first step towards de-toxificatrion or rehab,h/her physical trauma is taken care of at the hospital.Depending on the tenure of the user,the psychiatriast administers certain psychotropic drugs which mimic the symptoms of the drug h/she was using.This is to minimize the withdrawals.

Having said that,let us cut to the chase: it is week 3 and your withdrawls are under medical control.The appetite returns to normal.Most importantly the THOUGHT PROCESS is restored.Having pangs of remorse is actually GOOD NEWS.Your loved ones are all rallying around you.You are capable of IMAGINING and remember what life was before the addiction.Now VISUALISE how happy you can be again and all those around you.

“Visualization is simply powerfully focused thoughts in pictures.When you visualize then you materialize(as in create).”

“Let no thought of limitation enter your mind”

The above two quotes are from Rhonda Byrne’s book “The Secret the Power.”And another amazing quote from the author of the “Rich dad Poor Dad” books, ROBERT KIYOSAKI –

“THE WORD EMOTION STANDS FOR ENERGY IN MOTION.BE TRUTHFUL ABOUT  YOUR EMOTIONS,AND USE YOUR MIND AND EMOTIONS IN YOUR FAVOUR- NOT AGAINST YOURSELF.JUST BE AN OBSERVER NOT A REACTOR TO YOUR EMOTIONS.MOST PEOPLE STILL DON’T KNOW THAT IT IS THEIR EMOTIONS THAT ARE DOING THE THINKING.YOUR EMOTIONS ARE YOUR EMOTIONS BUT YOU HAVE GOT TO DO YOUR OWN THINKING”.

Healing,physically or mentally from drug abuse or any other trauma is a gradual process.People have bounced back from worse tragedies.DIVINE INTERVENTION or what we loosely call MIRACLES,have apparently been happening  over the ages much before we were born.They certainly will continue to occur well past our collective tenure on earth.I strongly recommend we all read Mr.Parvez j. Daruwalla’swrite up in the August 11^th issue of Parsi Times-“Miracles in the Zarthosty Faith”.Nothing more needs to be said.

After reading these suggestions please do not waste any more timein trying to second guess if I am an user,ex-user or abuser.It is of no consequence..Neither am I a motivastor,psychiatrist,dentist,mentalist,psychologist or a lunatic.

What is more important is to know that –When God leads you to the edge of difficulty-TRUST HIM FULLY.ONE OF TWO THINGS WILL HAPPEN.EITHER HE WILL CATCH YOU WHEN YOU FALL OR TEACH YOU HOW TO FLY.

Welcome back to living,dude.Make your life rock again.

You just took a DEEP BREATH OF SUNSHINE…..